A Hilarious Mail from a frustrated victim of chain mails

admin — Sat, 06 Nov 2010 15:06:40 +0000

I wanted to thank all my friends and family who have forwarded chain letters to me in 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, 2007 and 2008 and continuing it in 2009 also…….

Because of your kindness:

* I stopped drinking Coca Cola after I found out that it’s good for removing toilet stains.

* I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting on a needle infected with AIDS.

* Forwarded hundreds of mails but still waiting for FREE DESKTOP, LAPTOP, CAMERA, CELLPHONE etc…..

* I smell like a wet dog since I stopped using deodorants because they cause cancer…
* I don’t leave my car in the parking lot or any other place and sometimes I even have to walk about 7 blocks for fear that someone will drug me with a perfume sample and try to rob me.

* I also stopped answering the phone for fear that they may ask me to dial a stupid number and then I get a phone bill with calls to Uganda, Pakistan, Singapore and Tokyo…

* I also stopped drinking anything out of a Can for fear that I will get sick from the rat faeces and urine.

* I also donated all my savings to the Amy Bruce account. A sick girl that was about to die in the hospital about 7,000 times…. (Poor girl! she’s been 7 since 1993…)

* Still open to help somebody from Nigeria who wants to use my account to transfer his uncle’s property of $ 100 million. So much trustworthy.
* I have forwarded 35 emails to 400 people hoping that Ericsson or Nokia will send me latest mobile phones but those models are also obsolete now.
* Made some Hundred wishes before forwarding those Ganesh , Tirupathi Balaji pics etc. Now most of those ‘Wishes’ are already married (to someone else)

NOW IMPORTANT NOTE :

If you do not send this e-mail to at least 11,246 people in the next 10 seconds, a bird will Pee on your head today at 6:30pm.

Nothing has happened till now………………….. but who knows. So please forward .

Attention: Human Resources

admin — Sun, 13 Jun 2010 08:33:06 +0000

e-mail one
Attention: Human Resources

Sam S, my assistant programmer, can always be found
hard at work in his cubicle. Sam works independently, without
wasting company time talking to colleagues. Sam never
thinks twice about assisting fellow employees, and he always
finishes given assignments on time. Often Sam takes extended
measures to complete his work, sometimes skipping
coffee breaks. Sam is an individual who has absolutely no
vanity in spite of his high accomplishments and profound
knowledge in his field. I firmly believe that Sam can be
classed as a high-calibre employee, the type which cannot be
dispensed with. Consequently, I duly recommend that Sam be
promoted to executive management, and a proposal will be
executed as soon as possible.
Regards,
Project Leader

e-mail two
Attention: Human Resources

Sam S was reading over my shoulder while I wrote the report sent to you earlier today. Kindly read only the odd numbered lines [1, 3, 5, etc.] for my true assessment of his ability.
Regards,
Project Leader

Perfect Fact » Human Vs Humour

A Hilarious Mail from a frustrated victim of chain mails

Attention: Human Resources